Actually most diets do work - while you're on them. I'm reading a book right now called the "Diet Survivors Handbook." I'm not really finding anything new in it as yet. I know that until I change my relationship with food, I am never going to be able to get rid of this weight. So I read, hoping to find the magic bullet. You know what? There isn't one. My issues with food began long ago when I was a kid. Somewhere I learned that food would fix any hurt, celebrate any joy, fill any void. It's chic these days to blame parents who used food as a reward. I really don't think that's the problem. Lots of kids had parents who bribed them with food. Not all of them became obese. And anyway, I'm a big girl now. I am the one who decides what I put in my mouth.
Another good one is to blame people who enable us by putting food in front of us that isn't "on our diet." Unless these people are actually shoving it in your mouth, it's not an excuse. We enable ourselves. When someone "talks" us into eating something, it's more a matter of them echoing what we are already telling ourselves. If a big piece of liver was sitting in front of me, there isn't a person in the world who could bribe, cajole, or threaten me into eating it. I think inside each of us is a bit of the little kid that never grew up. And for each of us it is manifested in different issues in our lives. For some it's food, for some it's people pleasing, and for some it's workaholism or some other "ism." We use those "isms" to rebel when we feel helpless, to comfort ourselves when we're lonely, to substitute for the positive reinforcement we may not receive when we badly need it. For those of us with food issues, we often "wear" the manifestation. Long after we may have healed our relationship with food, we still wear the armor that labels us.
Lately, the stinkin' thinkin' that has crept into my brain goes something like this: "You're old anyway. Even if you lose the weight, your "pretty" days are behind you." But you know what, I don't spend a large part of my day worrying about being pretty. That was a focus for a different time in my life. Now I am more concentrated on longevity, on health, on being able to move around - and excess weight isn't good for any of that. As Jinx, Diane,Ida and many others who read my blog have pointed out - weight robs me of time, of choices, of quality of life. I love spending time with the grandkids. I love making soap, candles, and quilts. That's what I need to think about when I'm tempted to indulge in what I want now instead of what I really want for my life.
Anyway, that's where my head is at today. Have a great weekend!