I did some more reading in the "Beck Diet Solution" book last night. This book doesn't really cover the why of overeating. Those can be a varied as the people who do it. The basis behind the book is that every action is rooted in thought. It gives you tools to arrest those thoughts before you act on them. For instance, yesterday I came home from a meeting. It was "snack" time, but I really wasn't hungry. The thought process went something like this.
It's 3:00 o'clock, you'd better eat a snack.
But I'm not hungry
But it's 3:00 o'clock
But why should I eat if I'm not hungry?
Because you always eat a snack at 3:00 o'clock.
So? Why do I always eat a snack at 3:00 o'clock?
I don't know, but you always do.
So maybe I won't eat a snack until 4:00. Maybe I won't eat a snack at all.
Wahhhhhhh!
What's your problem?
You told me "no."
No I didn't. I asked you "why" and said "maybe later." I want to go work on my quilt block for a while. Then we'll see about a snack.
Now this whole inner conversation took place in mere seconds, but it was effective. I've noticed that when I go into overeat or binge mode, I often just turn off my brain. I think for me that may be the key to how I use food - as an avoidance mechanism. Often when the urge hits, it's to fill a void. So telling myself I can't have something only makes it worse. Instead of telling myself what I can't do I find things I can do. I know this all sounds simplistic, but as I was reading the book, something clicked. If you want me to change my behavior, do it by giving me something to do - not by telling me not to do something. "Not doing" something is like waiting for the other shoe to drop. I will "not do" something until I do it. Does that make sense? I'm not explaining it very well. Instead of restricting behavior, show me how to change its direction. That's what this book does.
Anyway, if you have spent zillions of dollars on diet books, I would encourage you to spend a few more (you can get it used on Amazon, or free at the library) and take a look at this book. Any diet will work until you go off it. This book helps you to make the change permanent.
In a weird way, ,the process you describe sounds very similar to that of a Memorization Learner- a learning style that benefits from a very strict routine and predictability. It's not a bad thing, but I wonder if it would not be a benefit to "change the tape" so to speak, and begin programming oneself with messages like I need a green vegetable for health instead of the conditioning of eating at certain times. Many of us were raised with this kind of thinking (it is noon so you must eat lunch) in order to create a functional ,working society. I think with a shift in the tape, we could do some very powerful things for ourselves !
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