Yep, that's where I'm at today. I have been stumbling around trying to find a plan I can stick with. It goes something like this.
8:00 am (which always follows a last supper food fest)
I am going to count points. I dutifully fill in my journal. Post about it on my blog. And feel that initial rush of excitement.
Have a low point snack - fruit or whatever
Still going strong. I've visited everyone's blogs to see how they're doing. Had a great lunch. I'm at 16 pts for the day.
Hmmmm, I have so many points left, that I can spend a few on some M&Ms.
Still have some points left - let's have a few more M&Ms
Shouldn't have had those M&Ms. Now I want more. Oooooh, that ice cream looks good. And I still have a few points left.
Points are gone, I'm starving. From 2:00 on I ate nothing but junk. Guess I'll start again tomorrow. Let's go see what's in the fridge.
Does that sound familiar? Or am I the only crazy one?
Since December I have flirted with the points thing thinking that I can have whatever I want as long as I count the points. It works for other people. Many people have done very well with it. Why doesn't it work for me? It doesn't work for me for several reasons.
I can't have a lot of choice. That gets me into trouble.
I can't eat whatever I want - sugar and I are in a love/hate relationship.
Food is not the problem for me - it's the symptom. It's how I use food. I don't have a metabolism problem, I have a thinking problem. I didn't gain weight because my body can't handle food. I gained weight because I use food to try and handle life. That is what has to change. That is where my energy needs to go.
So, again, today is a new day - a new beginning. It's like so many people have quoted Bob saying the other night on Biggest Loser. "Just shut up and do it."
Knowing me, I probably won't shut up, but by God, I am going to do it.