Well, in the chaos that is this house, I have managed to misplace my Challenge book. It amazes me that one room remodel can take over an entire house. I have found myself using it as an excuse for my lack of focus lately. I'm not sure which one is affecting the other. The workouts have come to a standstill. Yes, my treadmill is covered with drawers and other stuff from the bathroom, but I have workout tapes and there is always the great outdoors. My routines have gone out the window which has greatly contributed to the all round spinning out of control.
Okay, today's weigh-in. My total loss so far is 4.8. I don't know what the week's loss is because I forgot to weigh in last Sunday. I am very disappointed in my lack of commitment to this challenge, but I have to say, it's typical of my history to start out gung-ho and then fizzle out. But . . . I am not quitting. Good or bad, I will see this challenge through. I am angry - very angry - that I have let my issues with food control my life for so many years. Some how I will find a way to maintain focus when I am surrounded by chaos.
Last night we went out to dinner. We ended up at a different restaurant than we had intended. I got into the "before dinner nachos," (we were at La Senorita), but I did box up half of my order to take home. I am proud that I ignored my inner brat who was nagging me to just give it up for the evening since I was already on a downward spiral. I have learned over the years that it isn't what I do when things are going well that determines my success or failure - it's what I do in times like these when I am discouraged at myself for letting other things take over.
I am not looking forward to running the Syrup race because I can't even run a mile anymore. I will most likely walk it. I WILL NOT bow out of the race. I want to wear the tee shirt I paid for knowing that I'm not a quitter.
Update - 20 minutes later: I have cleaned off the treadmill. No more excuses!!
There is something about any major work done to our kitchens or bathrooms that really throws us for a loop ! Kitchens are like a public intimate side of us but bathrooms are the inner sanctum and when they undergo repairs, we are like orphans in the storm or something. I don't know why that is, but I have noticed it with my own life and those whom I am close to. Repaint our living room or lay carpet and it is kind of a fun hassle. Replace kitchen sinks, counters or floors and it is a hassle but okay. Touch the toilet, tub, sink or floor and the world feels like it is coming to an end for a time !
ReplyDeleteWoohoo! I'm with you girlfriend! I'm glad you were upset with yourself enough to clean off that treadmill! :) Patience and Persistence, the two very important P words. The best gift i ever gave to myself was to lose that 'All or nothing attitude' . I still struggle with it sometimes but i pretty much have it under control. You are the boss not the food! Give your self a hug!
ReplyDeleteGood for you....you are gaining back your control...go for it! Dianntha
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